I hate everyone

including myself of course. I hate that every time I try to take a positive step towards recovery I end up feeling worse. I hate that some people never worry about food and calories and weight and I’m stuck in a daily cycle of obsession. I hate that I have to dress up for work instead of wearing baggy sweatpants that hide my insecurities. I hate that my office is so hot; sweating makes me feel like even more of a pig. I hate the people I work with who treat me like I’m disposable. I hate that I’m always still hungry after eating healthy so then I binge and ruin everything. I hate that I never see sunshine. I hate that speaking my mind is frowned upon. I hate relying on people.

I’d love to be happy again.

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One thought on “I hate everyone

  1. I am in your shoes….I love you. Am sure many people do but sometimes you feel as if you are alone. I get that way so often, for example, me today. YOU are a goddess. REGARDLESS of your size/weight. Remember that.

    I also want to be happy again. Let’s try to be together.

    Liked by 1 person

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